Can You Have What You Want?
By Dr. Margaret PaulMarch 04, 2024
Much of the time, you can have what you want, provided you are willing to put in the effort and don't expect someone else to do it for you.
"You can have anything you want - if you want it badly enough. You can be anything you want to be, have anything you desire, accomplish anything you set out to accomplish - if you will hold to that desire with singleness of purpose." - Robert Collier,?Writer and Publisher
"Success is more attitude than aptitude." - Anonymous
The law of attraction states that, "Like attracts like." I have seen this to be true over and over. I have seen that when a person wants something badly enough, they generally find a way to get it.
The challenge here is that you need to know what you want, rather than what you think you want. And what you want needs to be something that YOU can go for rather than what someone else needs to provide for you.
For example, Talia wanted to get married and have children. This was her lifelong dream. The problem was that what Talia REALLY wanted was for a man to love her in the way she had never been loved by her parents, marry her, and have children with her.
As long as Talia's primary intent was to get love rather than to be loving to herself and others, she could not manifest her dream. When she first consulted with me, she was in her late thirties and her biological clock was ticking. She was feeling desperate, fearing that she would never realize her dream. And, if she continued on the path she was on, it was pretty much guaranteed that she would not get what she wanted. As long as what she wanted was dependent upon someone else giving it to her, she was stuck. It was unlikely that a man would come along who wanted the responsibility of loving her abandoned child.
Fortunately, Talia was ready to learn how to take loving care of herself. Through her devoted Inner Bonding practice, she was able to shift away from focusing on getting love and move toward wanting to share love with a man and with children. Needless to say, this shift in her frequency started to draw a totally different kind of man into her life.
Talia did eventually, happily, manifest her dream.
The same holds true for success in anything. "Success is more attitude than aptitude." What this means is that your attitude toward what you want is far more important than your native talent. While talent certainly helps us get where we want to go, without an attitude of devotion to what we want, it is unlikely that we will achieve success, regardless of how talented we are. We have all known extremely brilliant and talented people who were unwilling to make the effort it takes to be truly successful.
If there is something that you believe you really want and your experience is that you can't seem to get it (other than things that are not possible, like being 5'8" when you are 5'4"), you might want to look at your beliefs about getting what you want.
Do you believe that:
- it should come easily - that you shouldn't have to work hard at it?
- it should come quickly - that if it takes a long time you are a failure?
- if you really want something, someone should give it to you? Or someone should do the work for you?
If there is something you really want and you are not getting it or not seeing yourself move toward getting it, it is more likely an attitude issue rather than an aptitude issue.
Join Dr. Margaret Paul for her 30-Day at-home Course: "Love Yourself: An Inner Bonding Experience to Heal Anxiety, Depression, Shame, Addictions and Relationships."
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Daily Inspiration
We draw people to us at our common level of woundedness and our common level of health. Therefore, if you want your relationships to change from conflicted or distant to loving and connected, be devoted to your own healing and become the kind of person you want to attract into your life.
By Dr. Margaret Paul