Oops I Did It Again!

         I think one of the toughest parts of the journey is making the shift from fear to love, and to love myself especially when I fall into old protections and projections. I often work with my piano teacher on this very piece. Can I allow myself to make a mistake without judging it...without turning it into an unkind act? The truth is practice is just that....and in practice you might hit a wrong note...but rather than be caught up in the one wrong note....allow the awareness to come forward and take in the information and if possible make a correction. Then play again. I have learned to play a piece through without berating myself when I hit a wrong note...sometimes I correct it immediately and other times I wait until I've finished the piece and begin again. There is no wrong way to learn. I can make it take longer by moving into judgment....or I can take the gentle advice and information of my teacher and make corrections as I go. The same is true of my own Inner Bonding process...being aware that Step 6 ask....how did that work? I can then move back into my inner and outer guidance and feel. If I still feel strain...there is deeper learning...if I feel full and at peace that is what the lesson came to teach me.

            I had the habit of believing I was responsible for other people's health and happiness. It began with a belief it was my role within my family. As I first practiced Inner Bonding...I was sure it was everyone's path to peace. The one thing I know for sure, and the only thing I can ever be sure of is that this path helped me begin to form my loving adult...the one that allows me to see my actions as experiments and lessons rather than condemnation. The Loving Adult can look beyond actions and find the intentions behind them. Am I acting out of fear? Trying to control something? Or is my motivation to be loving? I've learned that comments are opportunities for me to feel, and gather the lessons. If I feel peace and full...I acknowledge the comment and let it go...If however, I feel any reaction other than fullness...I have a lesson I can choose to learn. It's up to me.

            If I am in discomfort, often I can find I am in the intention to control, or seeking a form of external power. I may have a need to want someone to see my point of view, impress another with my knowledge, or prove something I believe. I will certainly feel discomfort when confronted, and if I'm truly connected to my intention...may feel discomfort as I speak...some tension in my throat or in my shoulders. However, if my intention is loving, a place of seeking to offer assistance, help someone else on the journey....there may be a reaction from another but I will not feel a need to defend. My body feels at peace. I can let it go and feel compassion for myself and the other person.

            My Loving Adult has no fear of missing a lesson, because my Loving Adult trusts that the lessons needed to grow more loving will appear again and again and the lesson is learned. Spirit wants us to learn to love, therefore the universe will bring us what we need to learn...and some would argue what we agreed to learn before we entered this life. My guidance has let me know I can't make a mistake, as the Course in Miracles would say...."all are lessons God would have me learn."

            If I am aware that my intention is the moment of creation of the outcome of a moment in my life....I can know I am 100% responsible for my experience of the moment whether I am aware of my intention or I am not. I have had enough experiences of large shifts in my communications with my children, my sister, my mom and employees. I understand when I am focused on being loving and open I offer others the opportunity to be loving and open. My shift in intention makes it easier for someone to choose to be open. At first I thought it was magic, or an illusion...but when I consistently "showed up" with the intention to learn with others, my experience changed. This showing up is authentic power...love is the authentic power and not the external power(control) that I thought was I needed to be a strong mother, a businesswoman and a wife.

            I think Step 6 is what makes this process complete. How do I feel now? I know often if I feel less than full...my first reaction is "Oops, I did it again..." and when I feel the internal judge trying to make me wrong....I start singing the words to lighten myself up...and move to find the lesson that I need to learn. I am not responsible for healing other people...or fixing them....because frankly none of us require ‘fixing'...we're just here to help each other along the journey. I am thankful for all that I have met along the journey...all have been wonderful teachers.