It's An Adventure

It was that time of year again. Time to decide what the kids will do for the summer. Brandon my oldest (7 years old) had already decided on an artist institute program which he did last summer at his school. My youngest Dylan (age 5) didn’t want to return to his previous camp and wanted to know his options. So the search began. I researched every camp in the area and made appointments to go visit them over several weekends. One day Dylan came home announcing he had decided he would go to the camp that is provided at his school with all his school buddies. He was excited, especially because a boy who he had become very close to over the school year was going too. Made perfect sense to me that he would want to be with kids he knew in an environment he was completely familiar with. This particular camp program is somewhat weak. I knew this because my oldest had tried it out last year and “hated it” as he so eloquently put it. However, as long as Dylan was happy and comfortable that was all that mattered. 

A few weeks later I remembered that I had made an appointment to take a tour of a camp that I had gotten off the internet. It was a beautiful day so I thought, why not, just for fun, lets  go check it out. The camp was on approximately 21 acres and offered everything a child would like, from a children’s water park, to a game room with all the new technology that kids love. An Indoor swimming pool in case  it rains and horses for riding. A child’s paradise. So I wasn’t shocked when Dylan came running to me from the game room all smiles declaring “this is where I am going to camp!”. My immediate thought was, wait until he realizes none of his friends are signed up for this camp, in fact, no one we knew. I figured that will most likely change his mind and if that didn’t the fact that he would have to take a bus, would most certainly do it.  When we arrived home my husband and I sat Dylan down and broke the news to him assuming he would then stick with the original plan of attending camp with his friends.  When we were done explaining the situation, Dylan, in a very matter of fact and determined way said “I am going to the new camp and I can’t wait!” For days we held off on putting a deposit down and waited for the doubtfulness and fear to set in. One morning while walking Dylan to class, still waiting for him to waiver, I said to Dylan “Are you sure you want to go to this camp, just so you know, none of your friends will be there and you will have to take a bus. Dylan replied in his most sweet, casual way “Yup, it’ll be an adventure mom” and so the deposit was submitted reserving a spot for Dylan at the camp of his choice. His choice to see it as an adventure rather than something to fear. 

Now one month later, I find myself for the first time ever, leaving my boys and flying off to an intensive in Colorado. My dream, for what feels like my whole life, has always been to be a therapist or counselor of some type. I attempted several times to make this dream come true, (undergraduate, masters programs etc. ) but whenever I seemed to make headway life would happen and take me in another direction or cause me to stop. In hindsight I now know my obstacles were put there because traditional therapy was not the road I was destined to take. I had to first find Inner Bonding and work on myself before I could offer any guidance to someone else.  Now, 10 years later, a stalled career on wall street, a second marriage and two beautiful children I finally can see the brass ring. Five days assisting at an intensive and I will be that much closer to doing what I have dreamed of doing - helping people achieve joy.  

As I lie awake at 3:00 in the morning nervous, unable to sleep I hear the thoughts going through my head. I don’t want to fly on a plane alone, will I be okay? Will my kids be okay without me? What if I don’t know anyone or worse what if they don’t like me?  My wounded thoughts kept playing in my head over and over paralyzing me. I desperately tried to bring in a loving adult or guidance but was having trouble accessing it. Then all of a sudden I remembered the choice Dylan had made. The choice of adventure rather than fear. A choice that supports me, not paralyzes me, the choice of truth rather than lies, the choice of love. So here I am on a plane to Colorado going after my dream choosing to see it as an adventure. I feel like a modern day Harrison Ford going after the holy grail only instead of a gun, cowboy hat and rope I have a bottle of water, a lap top and a picture of my boys. Realizing in my heart that how we choose to see things makes all the difference in the world. The choice to be loving, caring, supportive to myself and to give up control is always there and mine to make. So here I am excited to embark on my new adventure. The next time you are challenged or thrown into unfamiliar waters remember the choice is yours, tap into the adventurous kid in you and choose love over fear.